The thing I hate most about “not all men" guys, or men who are affronted by the idea that they are schrodinger’s rapist, is that they act like women enjoy feeling that men may be dangerous. As if it’s something to lord over men rather than a shitty part of existing as a woman.
I know good and well that most men are not going to harm me, rape me, or harass me. When talking to an individual man, I don’t generally think “he’s probably a rapist.” but since I don’t know if he is, it doesn’t matter. This is particularly true because I know that if I let my guard down (and I have) and something bad happens to me, I will be blamed for it (and I have been).
Then of course I feel silly - because I know that many men think I’m silly - for taking seemingly unnecessary precautions to protect my own safety. These men complain about the multitudes of women who, for some reason, seem to feel unsafe, but do absolutely nothing about the scores of men among them who make women feel unsafe and create a climate in which women cannot fully trust men.
Not to mention that it’s just all around shitty to think that not being trusted without reservations is comparable to feeling justifiably afraid for your safety and bodily autonomy.